Chances are that you already have been through this. It anyways is awkward to meet someone unknown and more so when the purpose is matrimony. Most of the time such meetings result in wasted time and you come out of it more confused than ever before. Some uneasiness before arrange marriage meetings is completely normal, but your nervousness shouldn’t turn the meeting into a meaningless one.
Here are some ways to make the conversations meaningful.
Do your homework
Shrug off the “will meet and see” habit. Before the meeting, lay your hands on some basic information about the person. Like education details, likes, dislikes and family background. Go through their social media profile to get an idea about his/her tone, lifestyle and interests. Knowing more about the person can always help break the awkward silence and help tee off a decent conversation.
Listen to understand
When the person sitting in front of you is trying to share something, do not react with Ohh.., Hmm.., Fine, Okay, Nice etc. These words make you look disinterested. Instead, use words that help to continue the conversation, like, so what happened next? What is the story? Why did you not like it?
Listen carefully and make an effort to understand. It will help the person to get comfortable and open-up easily. Do not get excited about your next thought. Avoid putting out your thought before the person finishes talking.
Do not jump on to irrelevant topics
It is not uncommon to start discussing how ruthless auto drivers are, traffic snarls, pothole studded roads or politics. If you have any friends in common, do not start discussing their life stories, it is not going to help you at all. If you want to know the views of a person on a particular topic, you can always ask. For example, so what do you think about the excess use of social media? Irrelevant stuff – you can always discuss later. Remember, you are there to find out about the person as much as you can within a limited amount of time. Look at this way – you have 60 minutes to know about a person who has in existence for more than 13 million minutes.
Don’t try to show how awesome you are
While trying to put up your best side in front of the other person, do not make the person feel that you are trying to show how awesome you are. Such things make the person feel uncomfortable and he/she starts judging you immediately.
Your body language speaks more than words
Effective body language is another way to make the conversation meaningful. Perfect eye contact, sincere nodding, smile and spontaneous responses make the person feel that you are really interested in the conversation. Ignorant body language, for example, looking here and there while talking, observing other people, using your mobile in between create disturbances in the conversation.
Try to be as natural as you can. Remember the person sitting in front of you is also sailing from the same boat. The marriage things might not work in between you, but you might end-up having a good friend or a professional connect.
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